Good Grief

Some things I want my girl to know on her 8th birthday::

My sweet girl will be celebrating her 8th birthday today. I can't believe it. Time is flying. I didn't realize just how grown up she has become until she spent the day at pre-school with me. Every year she asks to go to work with me for her birthday. I obliged yesterday because civic duty called and I wasn't sure if I would be called on her actual birthday. It was really a great day with her at school, she was able to help in class, help carve our class pumpkin, our 4 year olds sang happy birthday to her, it was a big fun day for her. There were several 4 year olds that were just gah-gah over my girl. Which in turn made me realize just how grown up she is. They looked up to her-literally and figuratively. They wanted to know her every move and she was patient and loved being the big kid since she's the little one in our family. Today, as she celebrates turning 8, I want to share some things with her to help her through the next few years...maybe even life.
 Here goes Molls-from my mistakes, weaknesses, and life-lessons-carry these in your mind and heart, recall them and know mama loves you and would protect you from future hurts if only she could. Live and learn doll.

1. Keep smiling--your smile is contagious child. Contagious. People comment on it ALL the time. Mom takes that for granted sometimes because I see it all the time, but it's beautiful and it lights up the room, lights up my day and any dark mood. Remember you can hear a smile in a voice-so smile even when you feel like crying.
2. Continue to love BIG. I think your heart is both mine and dads. We both loved BiG and I'm thankful you've received that trait. It's a good thing, however, it can cause you to get hurt often. Loving big opens up doors for people to enter into your life that do not know how to receive the love you give, they will have no idea how or what to do with the love you give. Your heart is precious so guard it from those that have no clue. But when someone receives that BiG love you give-they will never ever be the same. Never hold back-love BiG and strong. Heartbreaks will come in life, live and learn from each.
3. Never settle---on ANY relationships. Friends, loves, acquaintances. Don't settle. This refers to #2 as well.  Love BiG but never settle for anything less that what you deserve. Ever. Mom went through lots of relationships to find daddy-o. I knew I'd find someone that would love me like  I deserved-so thankful I never settled and I've learned to never settle for less. Ever.
4. God's plans are perfect for you. Even when the world is crumbling down around your feet and nothing looks like it's working out--Father has it. Learn from the yuck, press through the muck and have faith through it all.
5. Lean on your brothers. Know it doesn't seem like it now-but in the near future they will love and protect you just like your dad would have. They both have their daddy's heart so I know it's in there-just have to let them grow and mature so we see it more. They love you, always have, always will. I Remember when they saw you for the first time how they oohed and aahed over you. How when we brought you home they held you with love and adoration. They love you-don't let them tell you any different. Depend on them.
6. Friends come and friends go and there's nothing you can do about it. But find a few that you know are steadfast and true and you won't need many. The types of friends you have come with the different stages in life. Goodtime friends, steadfast friends, workplace friends, lifelong friends. Lifelong friends are priceless-they are the ones who know you inside out and backwards and love you anyway. One regret I have is not being able to give you a sister. Thankful though, you have 2 female cousins that will love you like their sister along the way. Friends are valuable. You will endure mean-girls-don't fall into their traps of meanness. Usually mean girls stem from them being jealous of you, your life. Mean girls grow up to be mean mamas and mean women. Pray for them. Let them  be mean-but NEVER be a mean-girl yourself. Mama will beat you until there is no more mean inside of you. Re-read if necessary.
7. Dance like no one is watching and dance every chance you get. Remember how you didn't dance at Emily's wedding and the next morning you said you regretted it? Dance so you don't have to regret it later. Dancing is good-good for your soul, heart and mind. Plus, I met your dad while I was dancing. Don't waste time with a man that stops you from dancing-he should enjoy watching you do what you love.
8. Learn to love to read. Reading is my greatest escape when things stink. Read books you can get lost in, read books where you fall in love with the characters, read books that make you sad when they are over. Reading frees you from everyday stuff. Learn to love it.
9. Continue to explore and invent and do. I love how you find a how-to video and are determined to do the same yourself. Even if it means I have to clean up bright pink crayon that's exploded in the microwave. Continue to make that lip-gloss, nail polish, leArn make-up how to's. Obviously it works-you put make--up on better at 8 than most woman do.
10. Continue to use that imagination of yours. Let it take you places.
11. Never stop seeking God. Makes my heart happy to know you love bible lessons, the questions you ask about God and His world. Your desire to be baptized this year. Knowing my girl knows and loves the very One who created her and loves her is this moms main desire for her children. Seek Him in All you do and life will be good, not pain free-- but good.
12. Be joyful in everything---joy comes from within, deep down. Even with deep hurt, long suffering and rotten people you can still have JOY!
13. Always know mama's got your back. No matter what. There's no love like a mothers love and I'm thankful that I'm yours and i get you as my daughter and best friend.
14. No matter what-remember in your short 3 years with dad, how much he loved, adored and wanted you. He was so excited to have a little girl and I know he had big dreams, ambitions for you. I know that if he were still here that I'd probably be a bit jealous of the love you two would share. I know you'd be the apple of his blue eyes. I know if there are windows in heaven he constantly smiles seeing your smile, seeing your life unfold over these last 5 years. My heart hurts that you must go through life without him but so very thankful that his love for you is able to seep in from places unknown, from others, your brothers, from memories, me-thankful that we've known a love like that and I will constantly pray that God will give you a man just like your dad, so that you can continue to experience that kind of love. Continue to let God be your Heavenly Father and love you in place of your earthly father. With the love of Him you are never cheated, no matter what the world may say. You are not Fatherless. You are a daughter of the Most High King. You are loved.

Happy 8th Birthday Molls! Thankful for the crazy, messy, joy, drama you bring into our families lives.  I love you to the eastest to the westest coast.

Mom